Who teaches children at school. Fear of being punished

At every parent has a dream - to raise an honest and respectable person. But no matter how hard mom and dad put in, they still have to deal with childish lies. As soon as parents become aware that their child is lying, they begin to worry and seriously think about who is to blame for what happened and what to do next? On the certain stage searching for answers, parents themselves are surprised to learn that when deceiving, children take an example from adults.

If the child is guilty, then his parents should be put in a corner.
Baurzhan Toyshibekov

What is a child's lie?

Naturally, it will be unpleasant for every parent to understand that it was he who caused the lie. In order to understand what childish deceit is, one must first understand what lies are. Paul Ekman, an American psychologist, views lying as a deliberate intention to mislead the interlocutor, while the interlocutor does not suspect that he is being deceived.

When a child is still at a young age, it is unlikely that he deliberately distorts information. The fact is that at that age he actually believes in his fantasies. You have no reason to worry if a child tells you fairy tales he invented every day, this indicates that his imagination is working perfectly.

Before a child lies without purpose, he does it unconsciously. Until the age of four, children do not use lies for their own purposes. At a young age, a person does not distinguish between truth and lies. He really believes that the people around him do the same.

The moment children begin to develop the ability to think about what not to say, what not to say, they begin to lie. After the age of four, the child begins to analyze, for which he can be praised, for which he can be scolded.

The child is aware of the fact that telling lies is an excellent solution to many situations. This is a kind of turning point for the child, when children begin to deceive consciously. Often, parental prohibitions lead to children's lies. So the child is trying to protect himself.

Why do kids cheat?

If the child is lying, then this signals that during the upbringing, the parents did something wrong. If the baby is not tormented by anything, he will not resort to lies. The main task is to recognize what the child wants to achieve using lies.
Fantasy and games cannot be called lies, because children at this moment develop their imagination.

Lies as manipulation

Such a lie is needed in order for the child to assert himself. It is indistinguishable from a game. But if we compare the lie-game, then it is an exceptionally disinterested action, in contrast to the lie-manipulation, when the child just draws attention to himself in such a way that he wants to be admired. The child does this using the feelings of other people. In such cases, the child may say that he was offended in order to become the center of attention for a while.

Fear of being punished

In addition, there are lies out of fear. Sometimes a child may resort to lying in order not to be punished. Shame is a difficult experience, even if the cause is petty. Children lie so as not to make their parents jealous. If the reason for lying is fear, then the child does not feel trust in the parents.

Different reasons for lying

Some parents may allow themselves to lie without even thinking about it. Sometimes parents themselves ask their children to lie. So, if you ask your child to tell a neighbor who is calling on the phone that you are not at home, just do not be surprised later that tomorrow the child will tell a lie to you too.

Sometimes a child begins to lie, because he thinks that he has ceased to be loved. Lack of parental attention leads to a kind of revenge on the part of children in the form of lies.

Thus, sometimes adults themselves cultivate lies in a child. To avoid this, pay more attention to him and do not scold him for nothing.

This year four young teachers came to our school. Two have already retired. The third one also decided to leave, but I asked her to work more and not leave me alone. I thought, who will teach our children. And I remembered the answer to this question of our teacher in the first year.

She said this: “130 people entered this specialty. Of these, 10 people know the subject very well. They will find a good paying job and never go to school as a teacher. Another 30-40 people know the subject well. And they will also find Good work and they won't go to school.

The rest do not know the subject, and will not know it. No one will hire them for a good job and they will have to go to school as a teacher. We call them "unclaimed" and they will teach our children. But that's not the whole problem. Good teachers who are still working at the school also find good higher paying jobs and leave the school.” It turns out that the intelligence of our nation is now being raised by the "unclaimed". And I don’t even want to think about his level in the near future ...

***

And so, with a diploma of a specialist, with excellent preparation, I started my favorite job. But it turned out that our school does not need such specialists. In addition, payment for this hard labour which takes almost all free time Well, it's just funny.

It is a pity that five years of study were wasted in vain. Probably, I will have to look for another job, where my abilities and knowledge will be in demand and appreciated. Or get another education - a psychologist or an actor (maybe the first teacher was not mistaken).

By the way, neither at school nor at the university did I like the speeches and reports of students and even students. Some kind of gray and uninteresting and I wanted them to end quickly. The same applies to the lectures of many of our respected professors and associate professors. And besides, as luck would have it, they usually read very interesting and necessary disciplines.

But I noticed that when I was telling something, everyone in the audience immediately fell silent and listened to me with attention and great interest. Unfortunately, I cannot see and hear myself from the outside, but I probably have some ability to attract attention and arouse the interest of the audience.

***

I think that there are two most important and important professions in the world: Teacher and Doctor. This is the basis of the foundations - the intellect and health of the nation. Having weighed everything well, I chose one of them.

It took 16 years to make this choice. And it started like everyone else. In kindergarten, they said that I was a great inventor and dreamer. In the first grade, the teacher said she didn't know what I would be when I grew up, but I was born an artist. She was right about something. I did not like the exact sciences, but was a 100% humanist. Although, thanks to my maximalism, ability to work and the desire to be the first in everything, I even taught unloved subjects. Hence the achievements: she read and told better than anyone, and even in typing classes she typed faster than anyone. And so on many subjects. In addition, with great pleasure she played in performances.

My work was adequately appreciated - the school was completed with a medal. And a difficult choice was made for the most important profession - a teacher in my favorite subject. In order not to pay a lot of money for education (with them in our family, as well as in others, there are big problems), but to get on the state order, it was necessary to pass the first exam for "5" and I successfully did it.

And now I'm a student Pedagogical University. interesting study, increased scholarships, group leader. And also beloved and very interesting activities in the drum studio. Apparently I still have the makings of a dramatic actor. In some cases, after my performances, colleagues in the studio gave me a standing ovation.

I really liked many subjects, especially philosophy and psychology. I even thought that I was probably born a psychologist. Because this science is very interesting and close to me and, it seems to me, I understand people and their actions. In addition, according to the results of many tests, I turned out to be the leader and the strongest personality in the group.

I accidentally discovered that I have an excellent memory. There were teachers who demanded to tell the given text word for word, without even changing their order. And although I am for a creative attitude to any subject, there is nowhere to go. The lesson was postponed and, of course, no one prepared the text. But the teacher comes and says that no one could stand the couple, and let's work. Given that no one prepared the text, I gave 10 minutes to prepare.

I, like everyone else, have read these few pages. Calls one, another, the third - nothing happens. And then I, one of the whole group, calmly and confidently tell one page, another, a third. Teacher: “You see, one person in the group was still preparing the task.” Everyone looks askance at me. How would they know that I, like them, read this text for the first time here in the audience.

***

For some reason, I remembered the final lesson on a very interesting subject "Pedagogical Excellence" in the 3rd year of the university. After the performance, each student from our group was given comments: uncertainty, bad diction, the wrong intonation or gestures, etc. And after I read my "Poem of the Sea", dead silence reigned in the audience.

After a long pause, the teacher says: “Well, there is nothing to say. Then the group's comments." And then praises began in my address: “She is an excellent storyteller and speaker,” etc. But the last word The teacher really surprised me.

Only to me she said: “I am sure that you will never work as a teacher. But our school will lose a very talented teacher.”

And now I thought that, probably, that teacher was a wise person. And, unlike me, she knew our education system very well. I don’t know what kind of teacher I will become, but most likely I won’t work in such a “system”.

A ninth grader was brought to me. A wonderful intelligent boy, his mother is a translator from English. She sighed: her son has big problems with the Russian language. She found me using the Internet and asked me to work with the boy.

At first I did not really believe in his difficulties. They were not visible at first sight, and the school where Gosha studies has long been heard in Moscow. It occupies a good place in the ranking of city schools. Not in the top ten, but it is well-known, and therefore there are more than enough people who want to study there.

Only the first lesson fully confirmed the mother's conclusion.

The boy could not distinguish adjectives from participles, got confused with questions to the members of the sentence and had a poor idea of ​​what grammatical basis. At the same time I forgot that complex sentences in Russian are different.

Later, my mother called to find out how the lesson went, and in response to my surprise, she shared some interesting information.

Children, mother said, spend time in this school in vain, do nothing until three, and only then they begin to study for real. With tutors. Hence the rating of the school. It is created by private teachers.

Most parents turn to tutoring at the beginning of high school, when they clearly understand that classes at school are useless.

Gosha has private teachers in mathematics, physics, chemistry and English. Now Russian will be added, and my mother is looking for another computer science teacher, she says that she is zero at school.

Maybe move to another?

Mom has reasonable objections. Firstly, the children are used to it, and secondly, where is the guarantee that it will be different there?

External studies are accepted from the tenth grade, and not all children are capable of self-organization, which is indispensable for studying in an external school.

Then what's the option?

Shouldn't the whole country, en masse, simply switch to home schooling? Know-how. It used to be like that in Russia. Although many then still entered the gymnasium, however, they taught there differently than in the current ones.

It looks like going to school today is really useless. And the education reform has already taken place by itself - what are you waiting for?

It was reformed by his desperate parents, who found a way out - private teachers.

Last year, another mother, whose daughter is studying at a different school, complained to me about teaching. Or rather, its absence. And one more thing... But then I didn't really pay attention to their complaints. She considered the situation unusual. However, the phenomenon is becoming widespread.

Well, yes, everything is correct: more and more often they began to bring me not entrants, eleventh-graders "for marriageable age", but children of the eighth-ninth grades. Even twelve-year-old children appeared, which had never been seen before.

And the number of tutoring firms is rapidly increasing: I constantly receive letters and text messages with requests to register on the young portal.

"We are a new firm," I am told, "but we will catch on quickly."

And they conquer. Because the number of people who want to study with tutors is growing every day. In all subjects.

Recently, at her request, I found a historian for one mother, and a mathematician for another. Foreign languages generally hot.

However, not everyone has enough money to home schooling children. For many families, this is not an option. And about the transition of the whole country ... Unrealistic. So it's a dead end again?

Curiously, what then is the role of the Ministry of Education? What are its functions in this scenario? Or is it not even aware of what is happening?

Saved

A ninth grader was brought to me. A wonderful intelligent boy, his mother is a translator from English. She sighed: her son has big problems with the Russian language. She found me using the Internet and asked me to work with the boy.

At first I did not really believe in his difficulties. They were not visible at first sight, and the school where Gosha studies has long been heard in Moscow. It occupies a good place in the ranking of city schools. Not in the top ten, but it is well-known, and therefore there are more than enough people who want to study there.

Only the first lesson fully confirmed the mother's conclusion.

The boy could not distinguish between adjectives and participles, he was confused with questions to the members of the sentence and had a poor idea of ​​what the grammatical basis is. At the same time, I forgot that complex sentences in Russian are different.

Later, my mother called to find out how the lesson went, and in response to my surprise, she shared some interesting information.

Children, mother said, spend time in this school in vain, do nothing until three, and only then they begin to study for real. With tutors. Hence the rating of the school. It is created by private teachers.

With the start of this school year 140 new teachers came to work in Tyumen schools. Among them are not only yesterday's university graduates, but also experienced teachers. Some of them moved to Tyumen from neighboring regions. Let's add what last years- now it is 48,700 rubles.

In total, 3,400 teachers and 2,158 educators work in Tyumen schools and kindergartens today.

The correspondent and photographer of the site managed to talk with five newcomers from two schools who, after graduation, got a job as a teacher of mathematics, English and primary school. About why they chose a difficult pedagogical path and what difficulties they encountered - read the material on the site.

"The exact sciences are more important than the humanities"

Meet Alena Tatarintseva, 22, a teacher of mathematics and classroom teacher 6 "a". He says that the exact sciences are the basis of the foundations.

– I studied in Kurgan state university at the Faculty of Mathematics and information technologies. She received her bachelor's degree with honors and became a mathematics teacher. After graduation, she moved to Tyumen, because she decided to study in the regional capital for a master's degree. Managed to enter there on a budget, received Teacher Education. Since I am a teacher, I decided that I would go to work - because I need both practice and experience. I wanted to go to school number 68. They took me here almost immediately. At work I meet with various difficulties, there is something to deal with. As for conducting lessons, preparing for classes and checking notebooks - there is nothing difficult in this, I am preparing. There is a lot of time, however, it takes everything away. Innovations are more difficult, for example,.

The first or second weeks turned out to be very difficult, probably because everything is just beginning for me. A lot of paperwork and filling out various documents. And I'm also a class teacher for sixth graders - this is a very responsible matter. I am not from a dynasty of teachers, I only have an aunt - a primary school teacher, she also works in Tyumen.

I myself am from Kazakhstan, lived there for 16 years, and then moved away from my parents and began an independent life. After the 9th grade, I wanted to go to college to be a high school math teacher. But my father said that you need to go to the 10th-11th grades. We even had a conflict on this basis with him, in which he won. Now I am very grateful to him for this, I am glad that I did not go to any colleges and technical schools. After school I entered the teacher of mathematics, and this, I think, was my destiny. After all, while studying in Kurgan, I worked as a tutor for two years. Here, for now, with children it is possible to find mutual language. Other senior teachers help me with this. This school has a wonderful team, all very kind and helpful.

“I dreamed of being a teacher since childhood”

Before you is a university graduate, 22-year-old Maria Korepanova, who became a teacher this year at the 1st "in" school No. 68.

- I came to Tyumen from the Sverdlovsk region from the Tugulymsky district. She studied at the Tyumen State University at the Institute of Psychology and Pedagogy at the Faculty of elementary education". I received a bachelor's degree and immediately got a job at this school, despite the fact that there were many problems with employment. I have been practicing here for four years, but for some reason they didn’t take me here right away. I came to the director five times, begged her to still agree and take me to work. In the end, I persuaded her, they accepted me.

The first difficulty in my practice is the adaptation of children from kindergarten to school, violations in discipline, information technology - documentation, a new food system. I come to work at 7:15 and leave between 16:00 and 18:00. Due to the fact that my students are still small, they do not notice that I am a young specialist. Children come up to me every time, they say: “What a cool one you are.” I even asked some if their parents told them. And they say that they themselves think so.

I really like my job and my class. We can say that I am from a dynasty of teachers, my mother works in education: the head of a kindergarten.

I dreamed of being a teacher since kindergarten, before I even played school: I seated dolls and taught them. My relatives were only in favor of me becoming a teacher. I have not received my salary yet, but what they promise suits me.

“From childhood I loved children and to teach everyone”

This is 22-year-old Alexandra Abramova, who chose between the profession of a teacher and a police officer. But the heart told the young girl that the teacher is her calling.

- I live in Tyumen, I graduated from the Institute of Pedagogy and Psychology. Now I teach at school number 68 in the 3rd "c" class. Since childhood, I loved children and loved to teach everyone. I wanted to try my hand at teaching somewhere in the 9th or 10th grade. It was just that at that moment I was choosing between professions - a police officer in the PDN or a teacher. But then something inside me sank, and I decided to become a teacher. By the way, I am the first teacher in our family. Getting a job was not easy. Without experience, as a rule, they do not take anywhere. When I studied at the institute, I thought that I would finish it and they would take me with arms and legs. This was my biggest misconception. Why did they take me anyway? On the recommendation of my classmate, who advised me to the leadership of this school. And it’s convenient for me to get to work here, and I just like it here, despite the fact that I had an internship at school No. 70.

Most of all, I like children at work. They are so pure and innocent. Children are such creatures that perform any task, if you take care of them, come up and hug them, they are ready for anything for you. The main difficulty in work young teacher- documentation, you have to fill out a lot of paperwork. Sometimes I even work on weekends. But senior colleagues say that work cannot be taken home, although this is not always the case. Expectations about work and reality coincided, I knew where, to whom and why I went. At first, I was afraid that the children would notice my inexperience, they would compare me with previous teachers... My worries turned out to be in vain, the children and parents support me in every possible way.

“I thought that they didn’t take me because of my age and lack of experience”

Another heroine of our material is Anastasia Strelkova, she is 19 years old. Despite a red diploma and a wild zeal for work, they did not want to hire the girl, but she managed to achieve her goal and is now assigned to the 1st "g" class.

– I studied in Omsk Pedagogical College No. 1, she also comes from the Omsk region. They decided to move to Tyumen for two reasons: I love this city, and my grandparents who live here, they called me here to “permanently”. She ended up moving after graduating from college this summer. My parents easily let me go, because teachers in the Omsk region receive a penny - beginners, for example, 10 thousand rubles each. I wanted to become a teacher because it was my childhood dream. I wanted to be like my first teachers. I have a younger brother with whom I played school. When I grew up, I decided to fulfill my dream, but my mother was against this profession. She said that parents do not respect teachers, and children are getting on their nerves, but so far my mother's words have not come true.

I admit, there were problems with employment. I applied to many schools, but everyone kept saying: “Wait, we will call you back.” Every day I looked through the resume in the mail. Once I called the 68th school, where they told me that the director would soon come back from vacation. I decided to go to school number 91 for the time being, where they also promised to call me back, but they never called back. Then I sat down and thought: maybe they don’t take me because of the lack of experience, higher education and because I'm too young? Everyone is confused by my age. With these questions, I turned by phone to the director of school No. 68, who promised to explain everything to me at the meeting. We met with her, I was greeted so warmly. Then they promised to call me one of Fridays and give a final answer. Late in the evening, when I did not expect a call and was even upset, they called me back and said: “Are you ready to work? Come out on Monday!"

I worked at the school for just a couple of weeks, but I really like it here! And the children are good, and the parents are friendly, and the staff is wonderful. There was a case recently, a child was waiting for a parent and began to say to me: “Anastasia Nikolaevna, are you teaching someone else here? I saw in the textbook The world' that there you have another class. And he shows me a picture in the textbook - there really is a different class and children. I explain to her that this is not our class and not me at all, but a simple illustration. And the child at this moment answers: “But what about, here are the walls, here is the board, and here you are ...”. I explained that it was not me, and the student joyfully issued: “So you don’t cheat on us?”

"English is the language of opportunity"

The last teacher we met was 23-year-old Aigul Ibrayeva. She leads English language at the middle link in lyceum No. 34. The girl teaches English in grades 5, 6, 7 and German in grades 5 and 7.

– I am originally from Tyumen, I studied at the Tyumen State University at the Faculty of Linguistics and at the same time completed a profile retraining at the same university. After graduation, she went to work. I looked through several options for myself, paid attention not to work in two shifts - and settled on the 34th lyceum. I just get to work conveniently, I live relatively close.

Difficulties at work are connected with documentation and, probably, with the discipline of children. They are now in a transitional age, and many people think that we are on an equal footing with them, because I am a young girl. I try my best to let them know that they have a teacher in front of them. I come to work at 8, I leave between 16 and 17 approximately. I try to check notebooks at school, which are hard to carry home. Some work still has to be taken home.

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