Psychology as a person to overcome himself not to cry. How to learn how to restrain tears in any life situation

Question to a psychologist:

Hello, my name is Zarui.

I have a problem with my mom. With many I can well communicate well, but the same topic with my mother does not work out. I basically trust her and I am sure that all our conversations remain with us. But when I want to tell her something or tell about my problems or just ask the advice, I immediately start crying and talking with a trembling voice, and as always it dismisses it or angry, asks to explain this is why I cry, because it is her ( And in principle, I) very prevents and the conversation does not work as always. She, in turn, really wants and is ready to understand me, give advice, listen to me, but my cry all interferes. And if I won't cry during such conversations, then we will have a miracle relationship.

I myself do not know why I cry, I'm not afraid of her and I'm not afraid of her advice and reactions, but what I want to say it is just about my life difficulties or that type, from what I'm not ashamed. Not shame Not fear. I do not know why I cry and how to stop tears at least only during the conversation. Well, straight romel in the throat. It bothers it very much first. I know that tears is a way of manifestation of emotions, but in such cases, emotions have nothing to do. Well, let's say I want to say that in my opinion it may like to like someone from my friends or someone just likes me or I have problems with studying or what I'm afraid not to find a job in a specialty or just fell in spirit or something I don't understand how do in my the graduation work. (A brother's graduation helps me and it happens that it gives a task that I don't always succeed and since we have little time it happens that I don't understand what I did not solve the task) and I can't solve this task too with my mother Discuss. Well, now, according to Mom, the time is that I spend on dancing (amateurly engaged in dancing 2 days a week to 1.5 hours) And in her opinion I should not go to the lessons this month so that time is also devoting the graduate. And the fact that these 3 hours a week will not interfere with me and what you can call it to my time of rest I can not discuss with it. Well, crying. I can not even the offer to completely say without tears. In principle, I can not go to the dance (although I want it very much) But I can't talk.

Please help, how to consciously do not cry in such situations ???

The psychologist of Tsibizova Ekaterina Romanovna is responsible for the question.

In your case, affects internal tension. Diploma arising sympathy, desire to find new job, stop exercising your emotions ... You have so much transferred the problems that you need to recommend to stop and think about the speed of your life. We sometimes not notice the cargo coming on us, which we carry because we do not have enough time to comprehend it. And later, unfortunately or with someone's help, we begin to throw in relatives and passersby, crying, defending your point of view, depressed, drink alcohol and ... so you can continue infinitely. Is it time for us to stop and tell yourself: "Calm down! You will be more if you start to act judicially and systematically. " Write all your thoughts on paper and re-read them, who threw out that they need them like that they are in our head. Your tears are accumulated negative emotions that you have through the edge. Your pace of life and desire to fill this life with meaning (education, work, family) cause you stress, from which you do not have time to get rid. Close your eyes. And relax .. Visualize your tears. Imagine that they are small ice floes, precious pebbles, and anything, if only it could be possible to collect them from their face and discard from themselves with the thought that your negative in them and you get rid of it. Imagine that every tear is a negative, from which your body is getting rid. Imagine a tear "Fear to break up when talking with mom" and throw it off your face, forget that such a fear existed in your head at all. Make such an exercise in the morning and in the evening, so that during the day your head is cleaned from bad thoughts and emotions that make you feel embarrassed. The main thing, do not dwell on this unpleasant situation and move on! And do not throw dancing. In dancing, we express our emotions without fear that we will not be correctly understood. Be happy!

Unfortunately, for tears there are many reasons, especially in women. There are cases when it is not even a sin, but on the contrary - emotional discharge. But it happens when tears, especially with surrounding cause aggression or simply can harm the cause. How to learn how to restrain tears in such situations and learn not to cry when you really want?

How to keep tears when you want to cry

Tears, as a rule, appear in the case when the body is experiencing a strong emotional shock caused by external stimuli. In this case, the first thing to do is to switch your attention.

For example, encouraging the threat of danger, distracts a person from pity to himself and mobilizes forces to protect. What should be done to quickly call a similar reaction?

To hold down tears, pinch yourself imperceptibly, bite your lip or language. The painful sensations will instantly return to you, which is called, to earth and cry does not want. Just do not overdo it, so as not to harm health and do not frighten the blood surrounding on the chin.

Another way that allows you to learn not to cry in a difficult situation, is in a smooth, deep breath of the nose. As soon as the tears rolling down, make a deep breath and slow breathtaking. Similar respiratory gymnastics are used by yogas, psychologists and all who want to achieve calm and harmony or learn how to restrain the anger and tears.

The method of switching attention is also very effective. At the moment when you want to cry, think about something completely outsiders or start looking at the items around you to the smallest detail. To hold down tears, you can also count up to ten or twenty, remember the words of some song or poem, finally, you can read prayer.

How to learn how to restrain tears if there are people who are capable of sympathizing and are you sure that they will regret you? Very simple, try to not be distracted on them. Because only a look at the expression of such a person will not leave a single chance to keep tears.

And despite various situations, do not forget that tears are an important element in a person's life, which bears both psychological character and physiological. Tears are capable of removing toxic substances from the body and remove the emotional stress.

Moreover, if you are impressionable and prone to the melancholy man, it is not worth to restrain. At least, adequately coping with the situation, retire and pay everything that has accumulated.

How to keep tears when you really want to cry

Every morning, standing in front of the mirror and looking into my eyes, repeat that you are stronger, smart that you really are better than everyone, you are not afraid of anything and anyone, you will be able to overcome absolutely all life obstacles.

You will be able to withstand any suffering, no one will break your will and will not make a bow to anyone. Thus, you instill aspiration and confidence, you will become more solid, and no tears and sobs will repay you, you can look at yourself from the other side and make certain conclusions.

However, each medal has a reverse side. As already mentioned, crying is a surge of emotions, and the emotions need to give will from time to time, simply put "to produce steam".

Upon sharp necessity, when you can not understand what to do if you want to cry, it is better to retake, cry alone or contact a close person who will listen to you and understand you. Speak, share your impressions, ask the Council. If all the tears should be paid, it will become much easier.

Why do the eyes of a person

Possible damage or Sorink

If your eyes will be turned off correctly and this is not connected with any emotional experiences, it should be carefully inspecting the mucous membrane. Perhaps it has damage or a sorink, which does not cause the feeling of the presence of something foreign, but the eyes will be watched. Try rinse the eyes with cool water, if the tear did not pass, consult an eyepiece.

Inflammation

Taming is sometimes the cause of inflammatory processes in the eyes. Bacterial, viral, fungal and other infections are accompanied by tearing. In this case, it is necessary to immediately turn to an ophthalmologist, which will prescribe eye drops with the content of antibiotics. It is not recommended to use such drops.

Allergy

How to stop tears if they are caused by an allergic reaction. Here, as in the previous paragraph, or consult a doctor (if it is for the first time), either in time to take an antiallergic medicine.

Tears from Luca

To learn not to cry when you cut onions, you need to pre-wet the knife and bulb with cool water. A substance that causes tears is dissolved in water and does not enter the air, preventing tear.

Tears when fatigue

Increased tears when the eye fatigue is removed by compresses from tea welding. Moisten cotton swabs in welding and attach to the eyes for fifteen-twenty minutes before bedtime. This procedure also helps with a minor inflammatory process.

Emotional tears

Stop tears caused by emotional experiences hard. If something serious and the tears of the tears happened almost lingering, do not restrain them, pay and release the negative outward. If we are talking about insulting, insulting or other conflict to keep the tears, try to sharply switch your thoughts and remember something good. These manipulations distract you from what is happening and you can keep the impulse of emotions.

What to do if you want to cry, but it is impossible

We are all very different, and in different ways we react to events taking place in the world around us. Some relate to everything almost indifferent, while others in the event of any stressful situation Immediately rush into tears. Meanwhile, crying to friends, colleagues or before foreign people is always unpleasant. So how to keep tears in a situation where it is extremely not desirable to show their interlocutors?

To restrain tears, imperceptibly pinch yourself for the inside of the hip or for another particular sensitive area of \u200b\u200bthe skin. The pain is always of paramount importance for the brain, and, it means that this trick will help you easily exhaust the cause of tears. The main thing is not to overdo it, and do not cause the attack of tears provoked by the pain.

To hold down tears, output yourself from the situation: Watch out that you allegedly forgot about any other important and urgent business And hastily remove.

Try to delay your breath for a while. Concentrating on it, you can easily stop the attack of tears and take your emotions for tight control.

Bite your lower lip. This trick is something similar to the first proposed method, and is aimed at "deceiving" the body, refocus its attention to pain. The main thing is not to leave the mark on the lip and do not contact it to the blood.

Think out in advance what thoughts will be able to distract you from the current situation at the critical moment. Alternatively, it may be memories of a particular pleasant, positive event, or an attempt to solve pressing, topical household problems. To hold down tears, try to resolve several problems at the same time or try to mentally be traded favorite poem, Return the lines from the favorite song, remember the multiplication table.

If you have the opportunity, then do some sharp, intense movements.

Concentrate on one or another object in the distance, and start studying it most carefully. The main thing - do not look in the face of a person who can make you cry. If it is difficult to avoid direct look at it, then try to mentally laugh at him. Remember about the ridiculous offender habits or imagine it, closed in a ridiculous clown suit.

Now you know how to hold down tears in the right situation. However, do not apply the above techniques constantly: psychologists argue that tears are the best way to psychological discharge and physiological protection against stress.

How to learn not to cry if you really want

We are all very different. And we react differently to all around us. From some it is impossible to knock down and tears, and others, just - immediately into tears. Both have their own minuses. To cry for any reason, and even with strangers, employees, friends - quite unpleasant.

On the other hand, it is impossible to worry all the problems "dry", since this can lead to mental tension and deterioration. Let's try to figure out how to learn to restrain tears.

Often crying people, sometimes fall into awkward situations, when tears begin to run by the river, and even at a wrong moment. For example, she scribbled, the teacher at the lesson made a strict remark, nahami in transport.

And now they already have a whom to the throat, treacherously trembling the voice, tears roll on the eyes. But so I don't want to cry and show your weakness to other people's people! But there is no business in tears before, they flow themselves. From this it becomes even more generally and I want to go all over.

You should drink as much water as large sips;
Make 10 deep exhalations and breaths;
If possible, make several intense sharp movements;
Switch stress with psychological on physical. Apply this method: pinch yourself, bite your tongue, pull yourself by your hair. Usually this method allows you to quickly come to yourself;
Start in your mind to recall the multiplication table, phone numbers, etc.;
If the tears are caused by someone specifically, we have it in your imagination into some funny costume, or imagine it in the form of a gray mouse with huge ears or in the form of toads with huge oblique eyes.

These are very effective ways to hold back tears in the desired situation. But do not attempt to completely stop crying, as psychologists claim that sometimes crying even useful.

Tears are a type of psychological discharge and physiological protection against stress. Therefore, it is not necessary to restrain tears constantly. You can not constantly shy, looking through a sad movie, or a tragic story in the news.

If even quietly let the little tear, it is considered a small but necessary discharge. But when we are very sobering, we make active deep breaths and exhalations. Thanks to this, we discard the whole negative at the physiology level. If this does not happen, we will have psychopathic clamps, which lead to radiculitis and osteochondrosis.

Life situations are such that sometimes without tears, a person can not do. Celebration, resentment, disappointment torment the soul and do not give to calm down. So what should I do if you want to cry? Sometimes the wave can afford it. Nerves will come to normal, a man will calm down, the mood will even increase. Of course, if there are many people around the people, it is not worth crying to the public, but to brush the pair of tears anything terrible. This is the usual excitement, no one will be against. But manipulate your tears is not worth it. This often does not raise actions or even cause a negative attitude of others. Not everyone loves, when they are trying to manipulate with tear.

So why do people cry?

Sensitive thin nervous system;
Too emotional (actors, artists, people of art);
There are diseases of nerves;
They remove the tension in this way.

Of course, these items are conditional, and they are all interrelated, but some people really cry. Men are more often shy, trying to keep the flow of tears, but they get problems, illness, because the tears are better removing stress than the arted teeth. Nothing terrible, if there is sometimes tears come to the eyes, it is not ashamed, this body is getting rid of the accumulated nervous load.

How to cope with depression?

Sometimes if sad and want to cry, you just need to try to distract. Tears are a reaction to pain, insult, stress, so you can give yourself physical exertion, go to the training session, take a hard work that will outstand the experience. If you scroll in your head offense constantly, it will be harder. Optimists in this regard are easier, the pessimists are more difficult. They are more wounded, not always confident.

How to remove the attack of tears?

If you really want to cry, better pay. So the body will come to normal faster, calm down. The feelings depressed in themselves are more dangerous. They cause heart diseases, other problems on nervous soil. The one who constantly restrains the desire to pay, is often harder to experience all emotional shakes that came to his share. Therefore, if they brought out, breathe deeply, drink water or pay. Of course, doing it is better not in sight of everyone. But even strong man He has the right to tears of joy or sadness, do not need to be afraid of it.

Tears for reason

If you want to cry for no reason, then the body is simply tired. There may be a difficult situation at home or at work. In this case, take a vacation, change the situation. It does not help - contact a doctor, perhaps a certain nervous disease is manifested. If you constantly restrain emotions, health can be failed and wrapped with a runny nose, hay fever, asthma or other diseases. Change your life, smile more often. Look for positive moments that will delight no matter.

The article talks about how to hold down tears depending on the situation.

There are situations where pain and insult cause the desire to cry, however, there are such situations where these tears will be inappropriate. How to make our tears no one else see?

How to keep tears when you want to cry from the resentment, when talking?

Sometimes the tears are very difficult to restrain, and even there are such situations when it seems that it is simply impossible to do it. In this case, psychologists have several ways to take advantage of which you can take the situation under control.

Switch attention

To do this, you can take advantage of some issues that will definitely make you get away from crying. Are these questions like "Do I have a plate?", Or did my apartment closed? ".

You can recall the multiplication table, the text of your favorite song or password from something important to you.

Also, you can also switch your attention to another way, turning your opinion on some subject. It is desirable that the object of your attention has a lot of small parts that should be intended to be considered, read, etc.

Enable imagination

To do this, you can imagine that person who offended you in a bizarre image. Here the most important thing is not to laugh, otherwise you can harm yourself even more at the busy situation.

Pinch or bite your lip

Help retardate emotions can also physical sensations on which you will definitely focus, for example, during the pinching itself for the wrist.

Focus on breathing, or at all hold it

To do this, it is necessary to slowly and deeply inhale the nose and continuously exhale air the mouth, concentrating on the process itself. Also, during an emergency situation, the human body itself is able to get rid of secondary affairs, so you can simply delay your breathing.

Drink water

If possible, water should be made, concentrating on the process itself. Drinking is slow, small sip.

Make sharp moves

Sharp movements always help to remove the tension, so you can try to sharply get up, sharply sit down, open the window, plug the chair, etc. If there is no possibility to make sharp movements, you can simply try to change the position, straighten your shoulders, lift your head, while concentrating attention to your breathing.

Avoid straight views of third parties

Anyone, even a small look for sympathy in your direction is able to cause a quick stream of tears, so such views should be avoided in every way. No need to look at anyone, it is better to look out the window, on the picture, etc.

Resort to help handle or phone

If the situation and conditions allow, then in a critical situation, you can start writing something nice on a sheet of paper. Thus, it will be possible to distract from the stressful situation.

You can also use, for example, a mobile phone or tablet. If the tears begin to approach, then you can simply distract and look into the Internet.

Leave the room during passions

If the situation has grunted to the limit, then avoiding tears, you should get out of that room as soon as possible, where you caught the unpleasant situation. Such a solution will help to avoid tears, let go of the situation, calm down.

After the voltage is retreating, you can try to continue the conversation.

Already after the situation that the tears could cause you will remain behind, you should do as follows:

Cool water to get into the face, neck, hands to the elbow. You can use ice cube by attaching it to the wrist

Wash your face - avoid tears

View in the mirror and smile, even when you do not want. Tell yourself that everything is fine
Think about something pleasant, optionally you can read prayer
Drink sweet tea
Speak out, tell us about the exciting issue to someone close who can support you

How to restrain tears from pain?

There are also some ways that will help to avoid tears not only from the resentment, but also from pain. For this you need:

Keep your eyes open as widely as possible, while you should try not to blink
It is necessary to high raise eyebrows and be in this position until the pain is reached
You need to look up, while you should not raise your head. In such a state, it is until the pain starts to retreat
It is necessary to relax all the muscles of the face and several times widely and wide, and then close the mouth

In order not to purchase from pain, you can use some tips from the previous section.

How to learn to control tears and emotions?

In order to learn how to restrain their tears, control their emotions should increase their self-esteem.

Increase confidence and in your abilities can be daily training. To do this, standing in front of the mirror, you should talk to yourself that nothing and no one threatens you that you will pass through all the adversities that you are strong, smart, are sure of yourself.

In addition, it is worthwhile to take care of what thoughts will distract you in a stressful situation from the situation itself, when emotions are overwhelmed or you are about to pay.

Whatever situations arose in everyday lifeIt should be remembered that tears are not always a manifestation of weakness. Sometimes tears are simply necessary to remove the voltage during an emotional discharge - this is just the reaction of the body for stress.